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The marriage customs of the Dusun Kimaragang are carried out with well-organized rituals and consist of five stages: Mongumpai (matchmaking), Palabat (proposal inquiry), Mangatod (engagement), Mikonan (presentation of dowry), and Misasawo (wedding ceremony).

6. Mongumpai  (matchmaking)

Mongumpai refers to seeking signs of compatibility with a prospective wife. A single, eligible man visits the home of the woman he wishes to marry and spends the night there. Before sleeping, the man performs Momabar (making an intention) to Kinoringan (God), asking for a sign of compatibility with the woman. According to the Kimaragang belief, the man typically receives a dream, either good or bad. If no dream occurs during the Mongumpai session, the man can make his own decision. However, in modern times, the Mongumpai custom is rarely practiced and is left to the individual's discretion.

7. Palabat (proposal inquiry)

After that, the initial stage of marriage begins with the 'Palabat' or the courtship process. This process, also known as 'Lumabat' or 'Sumondot,' involves a representative from the groom’s side—usually a neighbour or close relative—visiting the bride's family to inquire whether their daughter is already engaged or not. During this visit, the representative brings a gift, typically fish, as a gesture of respect. If the daughter is not yet engaged, an agreement will be made to proceed to the next stage, known as ‘Mangatud dot Soputangan,’ which signifies the formal proposal of engagement.

8. Mangatod Dot Soputangan (engagement)

After the Palabat process, the wedding tradition continues with the ‘Mangatud dot Soputangan’ ceremony, which involves the presentation of a handkerchief as a symbol of the groom’s sincerity in proposing. During this process, a small delegation from the groom’s side brings a bundle known as ‘Damakan’, containing betel leaves, areca nut, lime, Sigup (tobacco), and Kirai (tobacco leaves) wrapped in a handkerchief. This handkerchief is then hung on the roof of the bride’s house.

This tradition carries its symbolism: if the handkerchief is not returned within three days, it signifies that the groom’s proposal is not one-sided, and the proposal is considered accepted. Additionally, the groom’s side also prepares other gifts, such as a ring, a set of makeup tools, and a rooster with long tail feathers that touch the ground, known as ‘Rundukan Taboi’. Once the proposal is accepted, an agreement is made to proceed with the next stage of the wedding process.

9. Mikonan (presentation of dowry), 

After the proposal process, the wedding tradition proceeds to the most crucial stage, known as Mikonan, also referred to as ‘Tarang Hantaran’. This stage involves determining the dowry or offerings that the groom’s side must prepare as a prerequisite for the marriage. During this discussion, both parties engage in detailed negotiations about the type and amount of dowry requested by the bride’s family. Below is a list of basic offerings that are commonly requested by the bride’s side:

Photo 1: The Beginning of the ‘Mibulugu’ CeremonySource: Azrul Affandi Sobry, 2018Next, the groom performs the ‘Bingkin Mongolim’ ritual, where he presents a betel nut with betel leaves coated in lime to the bride as a symbol of the marriage's validity. Following this, the couple participates in the ‘Miganti Dotlinumbid Danan’ ceremony, where they exchange rolls of tobacco leaves. Finally, the groom takes a glass of Kinomol (traditional rice wine), sips it, and passes it to the bride, who also drinks from it.
The bridal assistants then place a handkerchief over the heads of both the bride and groom. A Bobolian (shaman) conducts the ‘Mononsob’ ritual, where three burning firewood embers and a container of water are held above the couple's heads. A small amount of water is poured onto the embers while special incantations are recited, asking for protection against misfortunes in the marriage. Following this, the groom performs the ‘Monuntung Dot Botukul’ ritual by striking the Botukul (medium-sized gong) three times, symbolizing a wish for their offspring to be neither deaf nor mute. The highlight of the ceremony is ‘Migol Miandak’, where the couple dances the Pinakang dance, followed by the bridesmaids and the parents of the couple.
The elder close relatives of the newlyweds then demonstrate proper etiquette, ways to show respect and introduce the family names, particularly those of the in-laws. After the ‘Misusur Dot Koworisan’ ceremony concludes, both families dine together, socialize, and celebrate. Typically, another wedding ceremony is held at the groom's family home the following day or a few days later, in an event called ‘Maganda’.

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